Life was cruising along and then 2018 came. I became my wife’s caregiver. Her Doctor said, “no driving for one year.” We have two young kids, a home, and a business to manage. Most of our family lives far away.
Too often I would see my wife, Shannon, returning from a trip and she would place her head on the steering wheel and sit there for what seemed like hours. She appears to the world as happy go lucky, capable and strong. Yet she was in a big time struggle.
Caregivers don’t get the glory, riches and recognition that are so prized in our culture. The provider gets the glory and recognition.
Care-giving has brought me closer to suffering, and to the ground and placing my knees upon it. It has also brought me closer to the moment and the recognition that if we’re well fed, warm, and dry that we’re doing good.
It’s brought me closer to what’s essential rather than stressing over incidentals.
How are your essentials?
Most of us that are called into this work, are called by a wound. To the degree that we heal our own wounds is the degree that we can actually be useful for another.
I believe that the greatest healer is slowness. Our hectic lives cause our imbalances to hide. When we slow down imbalance has a chance to surface and be integrated.
I love the word integration (into greatness) and we get there through being a care-giver. To our own heart, and to the heart of others.
Most of us just feed the mind, what I call hyper-mental, which is the belief that if we know enough, we’ll be safe. The challenge of the mind, is that it uses thought which is a tool of division. It can never bring peace or a deep knowing.
Peace only comes from our core and within the cellular matrix of the body. So my invitation for this strange time, is to go within and be a care-giver. I know that I’m a much better human because of it